Updated: Jan 7
Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed us, regardless of whether they deserve our forgiveness or not. Just as important as defining what forgiveness is, it is to understand what forgiveness is not. Forgiveness is not forgetting. Forgiveness is an action that is coming from our awareness toward our evolution. It is an evolutionary procedure. Grand Master Choa Kok Sui, the founder of Modern Pranic Healing and Arhatic Yoga, has given us a priceless affirmation called soul affirmation:
“I AM That I AM. I AM not the body. I AM not the emotions. I AM not the thoughts. I AM not the mind. The mind is just an instrument of the soul. I Am the Soul.”
By affirming, meditating, and focusing on soul affirmation, we will start to realize that we are not our body; We are not how good looking or not so good looking we are. We are not how fat or slim we are; we are not our muscles nor our curves. We are not our size. We are not our skin color, neither our race nor our nationality. We are not our emotions; we neither are our happiness and joy, nor our depression or sadness. We are not our laughter nor tear. We are not how in love or how lonely we are. We are not our mind; we are not how highly intelligent or not so intelligent we are. We are not how fast learner or slow learner we are. we are not how well we can use our mind to create business and money. We are not a car, nor our house. We are not our income, salary, nor bank account. We are not our job position nor our social status. We are not our education nor our certificates.
So, the question is, what or who are we then?
“You are a Soul with a physical body, not a physical body with a Soul. The soul is inside and outside the body. The soul is basically Light traveling at high speed in all directions. The soul is the gateway to Heaven within you.” -Grand Master Choa Kok Sui
Once we realize that we, as humans, represent souls, one might start wondering about the purpose of our life as a soul on this planet earth.
The aim is to grow and evolve spiritually. According to Grand Master Choa Kok Sui, “evolution of the soul requires time, process, and a lot of mistakes.” One has their share of mistakes; hopefully, they can learn from them so that they can grow.
When we hear of “forgiveness,” who does come into our mind? During our evolution process, we might hurt ourselves or others by our mistakes. Sometimes when we hurt people, we expect them to forgive us easily and quickly. We might simply tell them, ‘forgive me, why is it so hard for you to forgive me, just forgive and forget, take it easy, don’t think about it’ etc. We EXPECT them to forgive us so fast. However, the game changes when someone hurts us. We start grieving over the pain, keep meditating on the hurt, keep reviewing the bitterness, and keep remembering how painful it was. By doing so, we not only make ourselves feel bitter, we also make people who truly love and care about us feel uncomfortable as well. These might go for years until a day we realize we have been deeply drowned in pain. And if someone asks us to forgive the person and let go of the anger, we might react by saying: ‘how can I forgive, how can I let go when that person has hurt me so badly?’
“You must Learn to Forgive, or you will dry up like deadwood.” -Grand Master Choa Kok Sui
You see, we think if we forgive, we are doing a favor to the other person. Lord Buddha said Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. Maybe one of the lessons that our soul needs to learn in this lifetime is to forgive.